I Need a Keg and a Six-Pack to Hold Me Until I Tap the Keg

Have you ever noticed how, when people are placing fast-food orders, they'll often say something like, "Yeah, I need a dozen Big Mac Extra Value Meals – uhh, let's supersize those – and a 50 piece bucket of McNuggets. Oh, and can I get that to go?" I suppose, on the basis of simple observation and musing, that there could be some association between the gluttony leading to our rampant national obesity, and the language we use to acquire the means to said gluttony. That is, we (comparatively) rarely ask for our order ("May I have...?" — the nearest I usually hear is, "Yeah, can I get...?" which is perhaps better than nothing but still strikes me as being more on the order of a demand than a request), or even simply state our desire for it ("I'd like..."). Instead, we cast our desire as need, thereby absolving ourselves, as our free will, of any failings revealed by our order.

Another possible culprit is our national conflationary misconstrual of formality, politesse, sincerity, and literalness. Asking someone if they would mind [not] doing something, or if they would please [not] do it, is the exception. Rather, what you hear is, "You wanna ..."; or, if they really want something, "I need you to..." or "You need to...". (That drives me to distraction. Well, to be honest, it drives me to doing the opposite whatever it was I "needed" to [not] do. I won't berate people for being rude, but it does have consequences.)