Soaring Majestically, Like a Candy Wrapper Caught in an Updraft

Sarah Palin's fairly pretty, and she seems kinda butch, what with the hunting and all. So I'm thinking it's likely that she has some sort of lesbian past. For example, a fair few people suspect Hillary of being a lesbo, and she doesn't even hunt. But as Sarah's Republican, there's got to be a lot of concealed self-hatred there. Her homosexuality doesn't bother me per se, but I don't think it's acceptable that someone with a potentially unbalancing psychological problem should be permitted to be president. She can't even hold a job down, for Almighty Jesus' sake. So until she provides video proof of how she spent every moment of her life, so that we can verify the total absence of lesbian activity, she shouldn't run. Although, even if she didn't act upon them she could still have had the feelings, and hate herself for it. Therefore, in consideration of the lives of everyone living within range of the U.S. nuclear arsenal, she must not be allowed to become president. We have to assume she's a psycho lezzie, lest the proof come in the shape of a mushroom cloud.